SLOWLY LOSE MYSELF

 

The more I drank and snorted the more I slowly lose myself; more I ran from you the farther I got from what was oneself.  Most look at me today, and they know that I am not himself; how can a boy born into pain ever come to be yourself?

 

Up to heaven I look for an answer or reply that will save my mind; yet I continue in a path that is so dark and still so freaking blind.  Nightly I look up to the moon and wonder if I will ever come to find... that soul that lifts up those that count themselves as part of them called mankind.

 

Today I know I waste away in my loneliness as I slowly lose myself.  Shall I be like those perverts that always seem to shine and always assert oneself?

 

I cannot...

 

...though I sought.

 

Soon I’ll stand at the abyss looking down at what I have baited; there is no denying that this is what my life has always created!  There will be no tears as I look down at what I have always awaited... consider this writ as the only statement that I have given and translated.

 

Slowly today I lose myself...

 

...still tonight I lower oneself.